7 Female Celebrities and Their Personal Massagers
Sunday, August 29th, 2010 | Author: Pedro

a look at what vibrators each celebrity uses

According to a leading sex researching outfit, the Berman Center in Chicago, 50% of American women “currently use sex toys or have tried them in the past.” With 150 million women in the United States that’s 75 million women who use sex toys. That’s a lot of assisted pleasuring!

This bit of news got me thinking. A lot of celebrities happen to be women, correct? And if the study says 50% of women use or have used sex toys in the past then that means 50% of female celebrities must use sex toys! (My logic is flawless!)

To confirm my conclusion I did some intense research. I googled “celebrity sex toys.” Here’s what I discovered:

  • Eva Longoria of being married to San Antonio Spurs point guard Tony Parker fame is a Rabbit fan. When interviewed by Self magazine she said “I bought my first vibrator three years ago. It’s a shame I didn’t discover it sooner. Now I give Rabbit vibrators to all my girlfriends. The best gift I can give them is an orgasm.” Female celebrity that uses sex toys +1!
  • Teri Hatcher of Desperate Housewives fame enjoys toys. In a Howard Stern interview “She said her vibrator has beads inside it and works well. She says she puts herself in various positions when she masturbates, but never while wearing high heels.”  Female celebrity that uses sex toys +2!
  • Halle Berry of Catwoman fame uses sex toys. When spotted at a sex shop she was quoted as saying “you can’t forget your sexuality…you can still embrace your body.” I’m not sure what that means, but I think translated that means “I enjoy sticking vibrating objects into my vajayjay” Female celebrity that uses sex toys +3!

Learning this was fine and dandy, but being ever curious I wondered what about the other celebrities out there. I know 50% of them use or have used a sex toy, but being in the sex toy business made me wonder, what would be their sex toy of choice?

After spending months of research I have unearthed what vibrator each of the following celebrities might use. Using a mix of CSI Miami profiling skills and celebrity gossip readings I have created a sex toy profile for each celebrity which has a 99.85% chance of being maybe correct.

I present you the findings of my research: 7 Female Celebrities and Their Vibrators

1.  Sarah Jessica Parker

Sarah Jessica Parker’s Personality Profile

  • was on a show called “Sex and the City”
  • hence must really like sex
  • probably has tried many different things
  • this has lead to sex boredom
  • to spice up life she needs multiple points of excitement

Sarah Jessica Parker’s Vibrator: Triple Stimulation Vibrator

sarah jessica parker would probably use the triple stimulation vibrator

2. Lindsay Lohan

Linsday Lohan Personality Profile

  • started modeling/acting at age of 3
  • never really had a “real” childhood
  • probably has had some disturbed drunken/drug fueled sex
  • yearns for the peace and stability she had in childhood

Lindsay Lohan’s Vibrator: I Rub My Duckie Pirate Personal Massager

lindsay lohan possible could use the i rub my duckie vibrator pirate

3. Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton’s Personality Profile

  • can get sex whenever she wants
  • likes to video tape and share with the world her sex acts (aka, kinky)
  • like cute things like Tinkerbell her “hot” Chihuahua
  • has her own hello kitty doll

Paris Hilton’s Vibrator: Hello Kitty Pocket Rocket

paris hilton may use the hello kitty pocket rocket vibrator

4. Hayden Panettiere

Hayden Panettiere’s Personality Profile

  • tried to save dolphins from being slaughtered by Japanese fisherman
  • had a dolphin cake made for her 21st birthday
  • has a concealed tattoo (meaning she likes hiding things)

Hayden Panettiere’s Vibrator: Mini Dolphin Strap-on

hayden panettiere may be using the mini dolphin's strap on vibrator

5. Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga’s Personality Profile

  • doesn’t like normal things
  • has been quoted saying “I want your ugly” and “i want your vertical stick”
  • has a taste for the weird or painful

Lady Gaga’s Vibrator: Water Buddy Taffy Tickler

lady gaga probably would use the water buddy taffy tickler vibrator

6. Katie Holmes

Katie Holmes’s Personality Profile

  • comes from humble beginnings (Toledo, OH)
  • has a taste for the weird (Scientology and strange baby names)
  • when interviewed by her hometown paper she described herself as “honest, determined, and imaginative

Katie Holmes’s Vibrator: The Cone Vibrator

katies holme's might use the the cone vibrator

7. Oprah

Oprah’s Personality Profile

  • is a very rich woman
  • was sexually abused at a young age (so trust in men is low)
  • only the finest things can touch her supple body

Oprah’s Vibrator: The Gold Plated Lelo Yva

oprah could possibly use the Gold Plated Lelo Yva vibrator

Appendix A:  Supporting Photos

Sarah Jessica Parker’s love of multiple forms of stimulation:

Lindsay Lohan just wants her childhood back:

Paris is a big fan of Hello Kitty:

Hayden’s love of dolphins:

Lady Gaga only loves weird stuff:

Katie likes different unique experiences:

Oprah likes expensive things like her corporate jet:

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